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My maternal grandmother was the youngest of eight children, three boys and five girls. She must have been a bit of a rebel, as the first girl to marry. I remember my great-grandmother as a stern woman who managed to get three daughters to never leave the nest. Those daughters were my aunts Thelma, Lessie, and Mayme.
Aunt Lessie was the most independent, holding the only driver’s license of the three unmarried sisters; she actually preceded her mother in death. Aunt Mayme passed away in March, at ninety-six years old, and Aunt Thelma passed away about five years ago, also at ninety-six.
Although never marrying with families of their own, my aunts were a powerful presence in the lives of their nieces and nephews. They had hearts for children and valuable parenting lessons can be gleaned from their example:
Self-Sacrifice
I can still see the interior of Aunt Lessie’s car, blue seats covered in clear plastic with raised designs, perfect for poking. On summer Sunday afternoons she took my sister, cousin, and I to the kiddie pool at the local public park. Surely a sixty-something woman had other things to do - lazy afternoon naps come to mind - but she toted us to the pool week after week, thereby giving our parents the break. I like to think that she enjoyed those times as much as we did.
Empathy
Aunt Mayme possessed an uncanny ability to empathize with children. Behavior that I find frustrating and annoying was explained with fresh light by this little woman who could see through a child’s eyes. I am guilty of expecting my children to reason with adult logic, but Aunt Mayme could effortlessly recall the mindset of youth.
Patience
Aunt Thelma turned sixty the month before I was born. She had bad knees and no driver’s license, but possessed the patience of a saint. Nieces and nephews sent their children for her to potty train. Endless hours were devoted to playing tic-tac-toe and dominoes with my cousin, sister, and I, sharing her personal tips and strategies.
Aunt Thelma was even less mobile by the time I had children of my own, but they, too, were drawn to her side. My boys shared her love of baseball and the Braves. She sat on the couch and pitched to my sons, who ran bases around the living room. Later, they would curl up on the couch and watch the game with this great-great aunt who knew all the stats and harbored a dislike for Barry Bonds.
I learned from her that kids don’t need expensive toys and trips, they just need your time.
This picture was taken in the late seventies. From left to right: Aunt Thelma, my grandmother, Aunt Mayme. I don’t have a picture of my Aunt Lessie, who passed away when I was in the second grade.
What great insights you have gathered from your delightful family. You are truly blessed to have grown up around extended family. So many of us (myself included) missed out on that blessing. Thank you for sharing your experience, so I can learn too.
July 1st, 2008 at 1:48 pm
Those sweet, sweet women! I loved them all and I LOVE that you wrote this. I miss them all! Aunt Lessie sounds as wonderful as the three that I knew.
July 1st, 2008 at 2:47 pm
This is a precious post, Dawn. I have an Aunt Mamie as well (if you pronounce your Mayme as may-me?)
Anyway, though all my great aunts, they gave their influence to my life throughout my growing up years. I can remember being at the beach with them and playing Double Canasta till it started to get dangerous. How very sweet to have the gift of extended family.
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July 1st, 2008 at 7:57 pm
Thank you for sharing this sweet part of your life and heritage. It is an excellent thing to be thankful for and to tell others about!!
I love Great Aunts! Mine is still alive at 94. She and I have had some serious discussions about children. She had one daughter who had two daughters. My Great Aunt Helen has said several times, with tears in her eyes, that she wishes she had had more children. With one daughter and two granddaughters, she is very lonely.
Now she lives with her daughter and her husband.
I loved to look at your unmarried great aunts through your eyes. It is precious.
Love!
~J
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July 1st, 2008 at 8:36 pm
How precious that God gave you these sweet women! Great lessons.
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July 2nd, 2008 at 11:04 am
Great insight. I love families that share like that. what a wonderful blog.
Terri
http;//heartfeltwords4kids.blogspot.com
http://www.freewebs.com/heartfeltwords4kids/
July 3rd, 2008 at 2:14 am
All the traits I wish I had more of… What a blessing to have those women in your life. And even now, though they are gone, their legacy is living on in your heart.
Such beautiful women.
-Andrea
July 12th, 2008 at 12:09 am