Dawn Camp

When We Give Each Other the Benefit of the Doubt @ (in)courage

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When We Give Each Other the Benefit of the Doubt today at (in)courage

Recently, three friends and I joined thousands of buyers and sellers at the Atlanta International Gift and Home Furnishings Market, one of the world’s largest wholesale shows. We received guest passes, and although our name badges identified us as exhibitors, really we were gawkers, mostly-window shoppers, and grown women acting as giddy as kids in a candy shop.

We could hardly comprehend our good fortune: a day roaming show rooms, tasting samples, and hunting bargains on the cash and carry floor, plus the anticipation of a dinner event that evening. For most, the market is big business. For us, it was play: taking selfies with a man creating a balloon dress for a showroom display, obtaining an up-close-and-personal look at coming trends, getting a glimpse of what it feels like to work an outside-the-home job. The years we’ve spent caring for and teaching our children made this extravagant dose of me-time, of us-time, even sweeter.

We shared intimate details of our lives in a crowded food court over overpriced chicken salad sandwiches and bottled water. We roamed together when our interests were the same and apart when we wanted to explore different things. We were altogether comfortable.

Late in the afternoon, we found ourselves seated in barstools while our hair was styled. (It’s hard to resist when someone wielding a fancy tool offers to do your hair, especially when you have somewhere to go later that day.) When they added extensions that perfectly matched our current shades, our heads nearly exploded. We were awed by how good it felt: mirrored reflections that more closely matched what we felt on the inside.

We oohed and aahed over each other, hugged the man who made the magic happen, and walked away transformed. I knew how hard it would be to wear the extensions later, outside this circle of friends, faced with what the world might say (or whisper).

In some relationships, I’ve worn a mask, not sure if my friends would like the real me. But in true friendships, we view each other through a lens of love. Love offers acceptance. When we act in love, we handle each other’s hearts with care.

When love covers all, friendships can grow roots, both wide and deep.

Come visit me today at (in)courage for the rest of the story and see what happened when we got on the wrong bus!

When We Give Each Other the Benefit of the Doubt

How Do We Have Love for One Another?

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This week we not only approach the beginning of a new year but the birth of a new decade. Our family feels it especially, as my oldest daughter prepares to deliver her second child and we celebrate my second daughter’s twentieth birthday. I still remember the fear and uncertainty of expecting a child in the days before Y2K, when the world wondered whether we would experience widespread computer malfunctions that would send our banking and power systems into chaos since many computer programs used double digit dates for the year and we entered the year 2000, not 1900.

I think we typically approach milestone dates with unease and uncertainty. Am I where I thought I would be personally or professionally by this time? If not, why not? What are my goals and resolutions for the year? Do we typically set higher expectations for ourselves at the start of a new decade?

My hopes for my children, as they grow into adults, have shifted with time. In our early parenting days, I wanted to raise smart, accomplished children (and of course, I still do). The grades I made and the schools I attended were very important to me. Now what I want most is for them to be good, kind people, to make a difference in the world (even on the smallest of scales), to hold fast to faith, to live joyful lives. Although these expectations seem simple, look around and you’ll see they aren’t easily attained. 

When our Heavenly Father looks down on us — His children — what does He hope to see? I imagine He’s more concerned with our character than our resume. 

Please join me today at (in)courage for the rest of the post as we prepare for a new year and a new decade!

How Do We Have Love for One Another?

You Are Not Alone at (in)courage

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A few years ago, my dad and stepmom moved to the countryside of rural South Carolina to live in her childhood home. They went to care for her aging father, who has since passed away. Our family loves to visit and drive their golf cart and ATV beneath the trees and over the fields of the property. They live on several acres, home to an assortment of animals ranging from cats and dogs to horses, goats, and donkeys. While most of us choose our pets, they were once favored by a fascinating creature who, eventually, chose them.

My dad is something of an animal whisperer, but no one could get close to the wary, street-smart black cat who visited their property looking for food. His battle-scarred body bore evidence of a hard life and the effort it took to survive without an owner. He ate what was left out for him but wanted nothing to do with those who placed it there.

His trust issues probably stemmed from a life in which he’d received little kindness, much less affection.

You can only imagine my dad and stepmom’s surprise the day they looked outside and saw our youngest daughter sitting on their back steps holding that big black cat and scratching him behind the ears. How did she charm this animal who didn’t want anything to do with anybody?

She meowed at him.

That one word — one sound — crumbled the protective fortress around his feline heart. She bridged the gap when she spoke his language. From that day forward, Lamont, as my dad named him, was a lover not a fighter. He no longer feared people but learned to trust them. I remember the weight of him curled against me while I sat on the porch, his purr a rhythmic motor rumbling deep inside him.

Like Lamont, we all yearn for affection and connection, but trust doesn’t come cheap. If we’ve been burned by past relationships, we learn to build walls or make excuses to shield ourselves from the rejection we fear.

Please come visit me at (in)courage for the rest of the story!

You Are Not Alone

Exactly Where I Need to Be When I Need to Be There

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When people realize I have eight children, they often remark, “You must be so patient!” Actually, nothing could be further from the truth. When I want something done I want it done yesterday — or at least now. Recently the Lord took a frustrating situation that tested my patience and reminded me my timing and priorities are different than His and that He often places me exactly where I need to be when I need to be there.

Earlier this year, my husband’s company offered to include us on their corporate Costco membership, so when ours expired we had new cards made under their account. The cards worked fine at registers inside the store, but when we tried to buy gas it showed our membership as expired. The employees were always helpful — they made us at least two more sets of cards, and someone always activated the pump for me — but I buy most of my gas at Costco and felt like a fraud every time I had to explain to an attendant that my account was active even though the screen said it wasn’t.

I finally decided to wait at the membership desk until they were certain the problem was fixed. Little did I realize it would require two hours from a day two weeks before a book deadline, when every minute of my day counted.

Employees conferred, called corporate, and tested my card time after time while shaking their heads in confusion. No one had ever seen this problem. A smile masked my inner turmoil as the minutes ticked by and I glanced at my watch too often. Finally, the glitch was found — hooray! — and I would be on my way soon.

A young mom circled behind me, parked her shopping cart, then walked over to get her picture made for a new membership card. A two-year-old girl, strapped in the seat of the cart, had recently covered her arms and legs with black ink. Her one-year-old brother sat beside her in only a diaper. An infant car seat carrying a newborn rested in the cart’s basket.

My mind flashed back to a time when I shared her season of life, although my babies weren’t that close together. All three were content, but any mother knows that can change at any moment for no apparent reason.

And suddenly I knew why I still stood there: I was there for such a time as this.

Please join me at (in)courage for the rest of the post!

Exactly Where I Need to Be When I Need to Be There